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Final Crisis: Rogues Revenge Issue 3 of 3

Previously on Comp's Crypt: The Rogues killed a bunch of scrubs trying to replace them. Inertia's back. Zoom's still crazy.

Flashback to Weather Wizard killing his brother and getting his weather-wand thing of a ma jig to escape prison. Hurray! And now our lovable crew of bad guys is heading back to the observatory that happened in. Apparently the old Flash villain THE TOP made a safehouse there back in the day, with equipment capable of locating super speedsters movements. They get their lock, and Mirror Master gazes through every mirror in the area until he spots Inertia and Zoom together.

In some weird train park, Zoom is trying to teach Inertia to TRAVEL THROUGH TIME! Inertia can't because he SUCKS, but Zoom is insistent because apparently causing heroes tragedy will make the heroes stronger. Zoom is fucking nuts. Inertia is beginning to figure it out when they're surrounded by unearthly fog. Oh hey Pied Piper. I had no idea he could make fog. Seconds later the Rogues show up. Hey villain team-up! Or uh...fight to the death. Not quite sure what any of this has to do with BOSS DARK SIDE (never forget) but let's go with it.

ZOOM HATE ROGUES! Zoom pummels the Rogues pretty quickly before Pied Piper locks up everyone's muscles with an attack on their nervous systems. He's pretty powerful for a guy with a flute who talks to rats. All's going well for the (I Guess) good guy until Libra shows up and stabs him (thats Libra's superpower, stabbing people!) and everyone freezes again because oh no...he has Weather Wizard's kid! Weather Wizard once killed his own brother though and calls his bluff, tense standoff ensues...Inertia gets bored and kills the baby, as well as attacking both Libra and Zoom. Everyone's NUTS!

Inertia declares he's now KID ZOOM, changes into an ugly red and yellow outfit, and attacks Libra again as Libra tries to call him down. Kid Zoom notices Libra has some some kind of creepy persuasion power in his voice, but also notices it doesn't affect him. He attempts to stab Libra with Libra's own staff, but Zoom stops him. Kid Zoom can now affect the timestream however, and reverts Zoom to his pre-superpowers persona of Hunter Zolomon, a paralyzed human. Kid Zoom is about to kill his new mentor when Cold stops him:

"Babies and cripples? You've got real class, kid."

Kid Zoom is holding his own...until Piped Piper steps in with the magic flute of doom allowing the five rogues to finish the kid off. So long Inertia/Kid Zoom. I'm sure you'll be back one day.

Cold lets Pied Piper know that he's officially an accessory to murder, leaving the Rogues and Libra in staredown number two. Libra lets them know THE OLD FLASH they first battled is back, and that they NEED to join up in the glory of Darkseid or whatever. They decline.

At police HQ in Keystone, the body of Inertia is laying outside with a message:

"Tell The Flash we're even. - The Rogues"

Finally we're in the basement of the Flash Museum where the Rogues are hiding out after the crime. They share scary stories about the dead Flash and Cold believes he's really back. So guess what boys, we're too young for retirement anyway. We end with a shot of Flash running.

//Complicated

Staff Comments of Awesomeness

August 4, 2011 - 07:25 BST - Nate

It's time to end this somewhat hiatus and start writing video game reviews for no one again. Funny that after all of these months of college and unemployment I start wasting time with video games and shitty reviews once I finally get a job.

Also, maybe I'll start reviewing games that have been released within the past six months for once thanks to my new disposable (heavy emphasis on this word) income. Maybe.

June 12, 2010 - 15:30 GMT - Benny

I got an urge to collect crap for my chao in Sonic Adventure 2 Battle. I had quite a lot of fun until I realised that I already had a chao with 99 in all stats. That took a bit of the fun away but I have another 16 chao I can level up. But now I'm in a mood to play Zelda instead.

May 31, 2010 - 15:53 GMT - Benny

I'm quite glad I went through with this The Green Shell idea. Combined with Hair, I've managed to build up a little backlog of updates that could last me at least a week. Although I have a feeling I'll put out a few of them at a time, which means I'll run out sooner. But yeah, while it's not necessarily easy to come up with shitty ideas for it, I have been looking around at a lot of random video game stuff over the last 12 hours and it's quite fun. I also need to play some more Star Ocean; I've got reptile aliens to kill and annoying girls to ignore! My hatred for Welch has gone down a lot since I got Lymle into my party. That annoying fuck pisses me off, 'kay.


Video of Awesomeness


Okay, so Finnish, but they sing in Swedish so it's alright.