Love is white
Love is green
Love is Felix the Cat
Love is broken images
Love is fucked up frames
Love is French
Apparently
Yep, this week's Crappy Link of the Week goes to LaPoin's World. A rather small world I must say. A world of love. Love and green. Yeah.
The first thing I noticed when I went to this site was how I was "welcome at it." SWEAT GREMMERE FRENSHFAGGERT!!1 But I decided to let that slip and kept reading the boring text on the main page.
I am sure you will find some interesting things just like my "I love you page."
And there we have the proof that French people make their kids drink wine from the age of two minutes.
Already in a mood to kill the LaPoin-guy, I decided to click on the second link in the menu. It was called "Love," plain and simple. "Love, eh?" I thought. Yep. And what did I see? Felix the Cat. And apparently I could help him by clicking on him. So as the brave hero that I am, I decided to take on this extremely idiotic task and click on the stupid gif-animation.
The first things I noticed on the Felix-page was "LaPoin Presents the [X]," "If you want to link this page I would ask you to use the following link:," and "You are visitor number [X] since August 18th, 1997." I'm a huge fan of red Xs, so I immediately added LaPoin to my Whom-to-kill-list.
After making the tough decision NOT to link to this God awful page, I scrolled down . . . just to see a mile long list of different ways to say "I love you." IN DIFFERENT LANGUAGES! Thank you for creating this site, LaPoin! We only have about 1,000,000 sites with this information already! But sure, maybe it was a new idea back in 1997 . . . maybe. So I kept scrolling through all of the black Times New Roman text against its white background, when I noticed a familiar word. "Värmländska." Hey! That's a dialect spoken in Sweden! "How do you say 'I love you' in Värmländska?" I thought. The answer was not Swedish . . . "Du är görgo te mäg." I guess would be the same thing as incorrectly spelled slang which has nothing to do with love. Thank you, LaPoin!
After releasing my rage on a chair I went on to the next part of the site, E-Card.
Lots of text and two links to http://www.all-yours.net/program/start20?write6281609471 and http://www.all-yours.net/program/start20?read6281609471. I hurried along to the next section without giving a fuck about this annoying piece of shit.
Next up, Smilies. "This might be cool," I thought, since I was expecting lots of cool images. But boy, was I wrong.
Boy: "Yes, you were."
It's a hell of a long list with ASCII-smilies. More than boring, I must say.
Here's a couple of examples that I found rather interesting:
%-<|> Drunk with laughter - Huh?
8-O "Omigod!!" (done after "rm -rf *" ?) - Omigod? Great, LaPoin.
:*: couple kissing eachother - Excuse me, but how the hell does that resemble two people kissing each other?
+-:-) smiley priest - For all of you happy priests out there. We all know that you wear a cross on your head.
:-) Smiling - Makes sense.
:-) ha ha - Wasn't this just a Smiling THING!?
@}->->- I love you - That's a fucking ROSE, idiot! Not "I love you," you love-freak.
WB = Welcome back (being back on IRC) - Hmm . . . if you're ever back on IRC, then use this fantastic smilie!
I hate you, LaPoin . . .
On to the STORIES-section.
Here you can find some stories which are (in my opinion) worth to think about. Maybe they will make it easier for you to find friends, to give other people an enjoyment and to get back enjoyments from other people.
Yes, I bet they will make it easier for me to find friends. Fuck you, LaPoin. *Moves on*
Your ad? Sounds like an interesting section. Question: Why would ANYONE want to advertise on this extremely fucking boring site?
LaPoin, I'm seriously going to kill you for making this site.
//Marshall
