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Updates:
Saturdays
Updates:
Whenever
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Interview With God
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We here at Klimp.dk have lately got an awful lot of E-mails from people demanding an interview with God. Due to the fact that I'm a lying bastard and that none of us never get any E-mails, I decided to do what no one told me to, and actually interview God . . . over AIM. So, here's the interview.
Benny: Hello, God
God: yes?
Benny: So, God, I'll start off by asking one of the world's biggest question, the one that everyone wants the answer to. Why did you create jews and eskimoes?
God: for hate crimes
Benny: Just as the bible says then.
Another question, are you just a lazy bastard who stopped caring for humans once they were kicked out of Garden of Eden or are you the one who makes them do whatever they do (child pornography, robberies, beatings, CD-Rs that break easily)?
God: i control all
Benny: Sweet. Then why do you allow such idiocy as hinduism?
Godk: i needed a group of people to fight with muslims
God: maybe it will start a nuclear war
Benny: Oh. Good point, you're not so dumb after all.
God: hopefully there will be big explosions with millions dead
Benny: Yay! But isn't that Satan's job?
Benny: Or is he fired?
God: i am god, jesus christ ,and satan all in one
Benny: Oh. Even George Clooney?
God: no
Benny: Phew . . .
Benny: If you could use only two words, then how would describe Cyle Barnsley, 7th grade in New York Elementary school?
Godk: homo sex
Benny: Sweet.
Oh, and I've heard rumours that you're going to appear in a brand new motion picture this summer, called Jessica Wants Bill to Eat a Door. Are those rumours true?
God: false
Benny: Are you going to torture the starter of those false rumours to death with a walking stick?
God: i shall hang them by their eyelids
Benny: Yay! We worship you for a reason.
Benny: Well, that was all I had for my interview. Thank you, God.
God: yes
//Benny & Random AIM-Person/God
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Staff Comments of Awesomeness
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August 4, 2011 - 07:25 BST - Nate
It's time to end this somewhat hiatus and start writing video game reviews for no one again. Funny that after all of these months of college and unemployment I start wasting time with video games and shitty reviews once I finally get a job.
Also, maybe I'll start reviewing games that have been released within the past six months for once thanks to my new disposable (heavy emphasis on this word) income. Maybe.
June 12, 2010 - 15:30 GMT - Benny
I got an urge to collect crap for my chao in Sonic Adventure 2 Battle. I had quite a lot of fun until I realised that I already had a chao with 99 in all stats. That took a bit of the fun away but I have another 16 chao I can level up. But now I'm in a mood to play Zelda instead.May 31, 2010 - 15:53 GMT - Benny
I'm quite glad I went through with this The Green Shell idea. Combined with Hair, I've managed to build up a little backlog of updates that could last me at least a week. Although I have a feeling I'll put out a few of them at a time, which means I'll run out sooner. But yeah, while it's not necessarily easy to come up with shitty ideas for it, I have been looking around at a lot of random video game stuff over the last 12 hours and it's quite fun. I also need to play some more Star Ocean; I've got reptile aliens to kill and annoying girls to ignore! My hatred for Welch has gone down a lot since I got Lymle into my party. That annoying fuck pisses me off, 'kay.
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